The Elephant at Her Eightieth
I do not want a piece of cake –
Thank You
Your mother brought it back
from Great Aunty Sue’s wake –
or was it her birthday party –
from that family jamboree –
Except for you and me my boy –
at The Grand Hotel – Brighton
which featured an elephant
in The Ballroom
It was erect – so huge –
tight between their party pieces
and it stood on your mother’s foot
John rode it for his entertainment
as your mother stroked
its flaccid grey trunk
And Aunty Sue asked –
Why isn’t your lovely family here,
dear Niece?
There was no honest answer –
not with such a whopper
in the room