As painful as this is

As painful as this is
it will change & our
doubts’ll disappear
[no acetic perfume
to drown in]/ Focus
on a cup of dream-
time sweetness/ I’ll
stay in Alice Springs
beside a dried Todd
[where a lover once
bathed – naked]/ I’ll
mute her name – Sit
with me? [She’ll ask]
& her breasts’ll float
[as we both crumble
into love] – so it was
in my soured dream
[my lights redacted]
& it seemed – to me
as my malaise faded
& on waking I drank
my fear – once more