I’ll sometimes trip

I’ll sometimes trip
but I won’t give in
& stop walking – &
my hands smart &

I don’t see an end
to designing – me?
I’ll not concede – I
am trading finger-

efficiency for cash
[no state benefits –
none to be had] – I
pause [I wanted to

to give up living – a
direful melancholy
in history directed
by my illness] – So

I rest to stop ill-will
shading my sleep –
To tolerate disease
& pain I evade hate

& words [about all
those ugly & cruel
hearts – bleeding –
& much-maligned]